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23 Things You Probably Won’t Go To

Thursday, Jan. 29

Pretty Girls Make Graves, The Prids

Dante’s

10 p.m.

$8, $10 doors, 21+

Pretty Girls Make Graves’ collective of veteran Seattle musicians deliver riffage without losing touch with their pop sensibilities. Portland’s own Prids join in with their famous live performance skills and dark sound that smacks of Joy Division. Sounds like fun … if you’re old enough.

Welsh Rabbit, Before Picture, Glance, Failed

The White Eagle

8:30 p.m.

$4, 21+

Guitar-powered pop with a touch of the early ’80s is the trademark of interestingly named Welsh Rabbit. Their name makes me hungry.

The Plastards, High and Mighty

Twilight Caf퀌� and Bar

Free

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Raunchy, stripped down, heavy rock is delivered courtesy of locals The Plastards and High and Mighty. Free is a good price to pay for such entertainment.

Friday, Jan. 30

Get Me Downs, Nightmares

Twilight Caf퀌� and Bar

Free

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Judging from the names of these bands, it’s safe to assume that they won’t make you any happier. Luckily, you can drown your sorrows at the bar while you check them out.

“Loot”

CoHo Theater, 2257 N.W. Raleigh, 503-220-2646

Opens Jan 30

$20, $18 student

First showing in London in 1966, Loot’s dark comedy and bitter satire comes to Portland. Police brutality and corruption figure prominently, so the timing seems especially appropriate.

The Soul of John Black, Jaroh

Mt. Tabor Pub, 4811 S.E. Hawthorne

21+, $10

“Rootsy” band The Soul of John Black brings together members of Fishbone with a fusion of rock, R&B, pop, jazz and funk, with some other ingredients added. Also playing is Jaroh, who have the slowest website in history. I’m a history major-I know.

Mates of State, Da Hawnay Troof, Rogue Wave

Nocturnal

8 p.m.

$10

Drums and organ is a good recipe, and Mates of State cook up some pretty inventive, melodic, and complex music with it. Da Hawnay Troof’s lo-fi analogue synths drive songs of love and loss, with such titles as “13 Wayz To Get Hard” and “We Got Big Diks.”

Bloodhag sponsored by Multnomah County Library

Meow Meow

7 p.m.

Free

Self-proclaimed ‘Edu-Core’ heavy metalers Bloodhag rock and throw books in a frenzy of educational catharsis. Their hope? That you pick one of them up and start reading.

Bigmuff (B.C.), Chain Of Being, Excessive Moderation

Ash Street Saloon

Cover

Okay, let’s pretend that Mudhoney didn’t release an EP called Superfuzz Bigmuff, and name our band Bigmuff, since there aren’t enough funky Electro Harmonix pedal names to use …

Saturday, Jan. 31

ThaMuseMeant

Goodfoot Lounge

9 p.m.

$7, all ages

Jam band ThaMuseMeant plays what has been described as acid-folk. Judging from the gushing praise on their website, they must be good. Personally, I’m not a fan of the whole jammy, folksy thing, but don’t let that stop you. Of course, you could instead be at the Little Wings show at the Meow Meow …

Little Wings, Graves, Harbor

Meow Meow

9 p.m.

$5, all ages

Little Wings is probably best described as a band on K records. Beyond that, any attempt to classify descends into a jumbled mess of clich퀌� and words that end in “-esque.” It’s better left up to you to decide what to make of them. Harbor (formerly Peace Harbor) brings layers, layers, and more layers of distant acoustic guitar, banjo, and drums, and Graves’ somber, baroque soundscapes fill out the evening’s palette.

Desert City Soundtrack, Desperately Waiting, The Motive

Ash Street Saloon

Cover

Desert City Soundtrack puts the sad, piano-tinged moves on you, then breaks away with an unexpected flurry of angry guitar. Be careful or else.

The Touchers, Killer’s Kiss

Twilight Caf퀌� and Bar

“Ooh-scary-ooh” band names have been done time and time again, but The Touchers is interesting.

Sunday, Feb. 1

Blood Brothers, These Arms Are Snakes, Harkonen

Meow Meow

9 p.m.

$10

A rockin’ good time awaits any who venture out to this show. These Arms Are Snakes’ tinges of metal and hardcore play off of the Blood Brothers’ sonic attacks and Harkonen’s dark lyrical sense. Worth the price for sure, and don’t expect it to be one of those shows where you can stand with your arms crossed. Get into it a little, and the experience is greatly increased.

Monday, Feb. 2

Trauma le Tron, Malibu Falcon,

Meow Meow

9 p.m.

$4

Cheap cheap cheap! Even if you’ve never heard of these bands, you should go. Malibu Falcon allegedly plays some mean rock in the art-punk vein. Also, the only review I’ve ever read about them mentioned the bassist dropping his instrument to join the audience, and the reviewer chose instead to laud some other band dressed in animal suits, which everyone knows is a cheap ploy aimed at gaining the approval of the gullible and easily influenced.

Robben Ford, Jaycob Van Auken

Aladdin Theater

7 p.m.

$22.50, $25 Door

Jaycob Van Auken is a man who knows his priorities-huge sideburns that put the sideburns of any other singer-songwriter to shame. Bask in the majesty of these mighty burns … oh wait, there’s music too.

The Shins, The Magic Magicians, All Night Radio

Roseland Theater

8 p.m.

$15

New Mexico’s own The Shins, in a cavalcade of press and hype (they are on Sub Pop after all,) descend on our simple town to bathe us in a maelstrom of sunny yet simultaneously dark pop.

Tuesday, Feb. 3

Star Can’t Dead Etchy-Sketchy Comedy

Jasmine Tree, 401 S.W. Harrison

8 p.m.

$3

Amateur comedy featuring PSU members and alumni.

Hewitt Collection of African-American Art

PSU Littman Gallery

Opens Feb. 3

Free

Instead of studying or drowning your sorrows in a torrent of cheap alcohol, expand your mind with a free art exhibit. It’s even on campus, so you won’t have to go out of your way.

Sevendust, Ill Nino, and Element Eighty

Roseland Theater

7:30 p.m.

$20, all ages

Sevendust … weren’t they big in the ’90s or something? I remember them being on the radio sometimes, but I don’t think that I would pay $20 to see them. They look like a bunch of wankers in every picture I’ve ever seen. They have the “long haired guy,” the “dreadlocks guy,” the “brooding blonde guy” … yuck. I’ll pass.

The Samples, Gayle Ritt

Crystal Ballroom

7 p.m.

$13, $15 door, 21+

The Samples are a ’90s pop/rock band that everyone will probably think is great in about 20 years or so. Go see them and you can say that you were ahead of the game.

The Plot To Blow Up The Eiffel Tower, Desert City Soundtrack

Meow Meow

8 p.m.

$7

What do fans of The Plot To Blow Up The Eiffel Tower say when they talk about them? TPTBUTET? How inconvenient.

Wednesday Feb. 4

Nada Surf, The Long Winters, Crosstide

Berbati’s Pan

21+, $10

Nada Surf are some talented musicians that play rock, pop, or whatever you want to call it, and do it with style. They self released their first LP, which is always a cool thing to do, and always seem to show up supporting indie mainstays such as Death Cab For Cutie. Seems pretty legit.

-The Calendar Boy