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Blondie gets old

Blondie is one of the greatest bands of all time. And although the band first became popular in the country that (unfortunately) brought us the musical phallus formerly known as The Spice Girls (England), Blondie will forever be thought of as one of the many building blocks in the construction of modern day punk rock.

Blondie is fronted by one of the most revolutionary singers of the ’70s and ’80s: Deborah Harry.

Deborah’s style and poise have given women everywhere the luxury to confidently strut through the streets of America wearing nothing less provocative than bangle bracelets, day-glow eyeshadow and checkered stiletto pups with a crotch-high miniskirt.

The band’s first, self-titled album was released in London in 1976. Since then, Blondie has given us countless hits such as “Rapture,” “Room with a View” and “Sex Offender,” as well as one of the best cover songs known to man: “Hanging on the Telephone.”

Blondie is an ageless icon in the music world. And fortunately for music lovers today, the great band is still creating music. The band’s newly released album is called The Curse of Blondie.

After thoroughly listening to the new album, I found myself incredibly let down by the poppy imitation of a once revolutionary punk icon. The Curse of Blondie lacks the impact of the band’s previous albums and, more importantly, the album is missing Blondie’s signature steel guitar solos.

Going through the album once more (this time, keeping in mind that its creators are in their fifties), I concluded that the album on the whole sounds more like an Egyptian/Indian rendition of “The Macarena.”

Despite my somber interpretation of the band’s new album I have to admit that, for a fifty-eight year-old woman, Deborah Harry can still rock pretty hard.

Tonight, Blondie is coming to Portland to perform in Lola’s Room. With any luck, the band will stray far away from the most recent rubbish it has created and bring be back to the days when Deborah didn’t have wrinkles and her guitarists played so hard they had to lick the sweat off their guitar strings.