PSU Vanguard Shield Icon

Haiku Horoscope

Haiku is an ancient form of Japanese poetry. Traditional haiku are five syllables in the first line, seven in the second and five in the last. Ms. Luna prefers to make her divinations through haiku and means no disrespect to the art of haiku. She would also like you to know that these horoscopes are for entertainment purposes only.


Aries March 21-April 20
For Aries people:
Finals are coming too soon.
Computer labs full.

Taurus April 21-May 20
Shopping mall crowded.
Customers cranky and dumb.
Shop on weekdays now.

Gemini May 21-June 21
Miss Cleo is a fraud!
Only believe Miss Luna!
She is always right!

Cancer June 22-July 22
You demanding Crab!
Horoscopes not so easy
So, nothing for you!

Leo July 23-August 22
You will get married.
Just kidding. Scopes not the truth.
Except Miss Luna’s.

Virgo August 23-September 22
Try to save the Earth.
Try to recycle beer cans.
You get cash for them.

Libra September 23-October 23
Neighbors steal paper.
For a really good revenge,
Play Metallica.

Scorpio October 24-November 21
Visit an art show.
Enhance your cultural life.
Make yourself smarter.

Sagittarius November22-December 21
Just three more to go.
What can I think of to say?
Spend money on girl.

Capricorn December 22-January 20
Goat people take heart.
This term is almost over.
Break will soon be here.

Aquarius January 21-February 19
You water bearers
Beware, it’s your fault there’s rain.
And we all know it.

Pisces February 20-March 20
New sweaters yummy.
The weather is getting bad.
They keep the cold out.