Spring has sprung, and it’s time to start thinking about your summer wardrobe. Most importantly, will you be rocking jorts, and will they make you look like Daisy Duke or a juggalo? Here are some tips to help you avoid looking like a middle-aged man-clown.
The Great Jortsby
First and foremost, pay attention to your body type. If you have short legs, you’re not going to want to wear jorts of any kind that hit at, or below, the knee. It’ll make you look even shorter.
If you have long legs, it might be best to avoid tiny cutoffs. Jorts that hit mid-thigh will help balance out the clothing-to-leg ratio and flatter your figure better.
If you’re proud of your hips, or just want to accentuate them more, try showing off those curves with a pair of high-waisted jorts. Just make sure they’re not high enough to tuck your boobs into, because normcore Urkle isn’t a good look.
Also, drowning in denim never looks good on any body type (JNCO jeans, anyone?) and can be pretty uncomfortable in the summer. Opt for a pair of jorts that fit well—not so tight that they’ll chafe your skin, but not too loose to where they look saggy. It might take some time to find the perfect fit, but trust me, it’ll make all the difference.
I got jorts—every different color!
While a nice pair of blue jorts is a staple, don’t forget that denim comes in every color of the rainbow and can either dress up or dress down your outfit. Black jorts, for instance, are another great staple that will instantly add a little more class to your ensemble.
How about trying red jorts for the Fourth of July? While certainly appropriate for the holiday, there doesn’t need to be a special occasion to add a splash of color to your outfit. Think bright, bold colors for summer: orange, pink, green, blue, etc. paired with either a plain or patterned T-shirt.
And don’t forget, there are many different washes of blue denim that each make a different statement.
A jort for every occasion
So maybe you’re not totally convinced that jorts are dressy enough for you or suit your style. But what about…a jort skort?! Woah, I know. It’s blowing my mind, too. If you’re into the ’90s denim miniskirt look, but like the ease of movability in shorts, then this is totally the way to go.
If you’re not one for ’90s fashion and plan on sticking with good ol’ jorts, there are yet even more options for you to try. Studded, bleached, lace, ripped or applique accents provide a wide variety of styles for you to take advantage of. If you’re feeling adventurous, try your hand at modifying an old pair of jorts with some of the aforementioned options.
The long and jort of it
This is just a starting point. I’m not here to tell anyone what to wear, only to offer some tips I’ve found useful along my own jorts spirit walk. Most importantly, wear whatever you think is comfortable and makes you feel good about yourself.