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Lovable losers, kegs, hooray for college!

Trendy messenger bag and new kicks aside, the most important thing a new student can spend their parent’s money on to kick off the new school year is a trip to the video store for a look at some silly college movies.

This particular type of film may seem to the uneducated viewer to be essentially the same story retold again: new student comes to college fresh off the farm and is mercifully taken under the wing of a much wilder, and yet surprisingly wise, older student.

Hilarity ensues in the form of super-funny pranks played on authority figures and one big party in which the young student invariably does his or her first drug or drinks – that first drop of hooch helping them to finally get laid.

Then comes the big ending in which the young na?ve realizes college is awesome after all and you don’t even have to study. There are common misconceptions held by those who are not bold enough to look further into a mediocre film for the subtle nuances lying just below the surface. So, let’s take the road less traveled shall we and give these movies a shot. What follows is a short list of films that are a must see for anyone hoping to enjoy college.

“PCU” While not widely seen, “PCU” is one of the best college movies out there. With great actors and a decent storyline this movie has it all, including a cameo by none other than George Clinton and Parliament-Funkadelic. Starring Jeremy Piven (Grosse Pointe Blank), David Spade (Joe Dirt) and Jon Favreau (Swingers) this film follows an incoming freshman as he embarks on a visit to his new school. His mentor for the duration of his time at the fictional Port Chester University is Droz (Piven), the senior member of a frat full of likeable losers who spend their time taking bong hits, doing keg stands and offending every student group on campus.

“Real Genius” stars Val Kilmer (The Doors) in a rare comedy role as a science prodigy who spends his time playing pranks on the administration and looking out for his new young roommate (see above list of college movie cliches). Val’s performance in this film is definitely one of his best; he shows good comic timing and doesn’t come off like a cocky jerk as he has in most of his other films.

“Son in Law” Pauly Shore (BioDome) did his best work to date in this film. As opposed to most of his other movies this one has a good story and a great supporting cast, including Carla Gugino (Spin City) as the young farm girl Rebecca (again see above cliches), to hold it together. The story is simple, Rebecca goes off to college, gets homesick and wants to leave but is taught a lesson by her new friend Crawl (Shore) all about the fun she could be having with the help of hair dye, a tattoo and new clothes. If you haven’t seen this movie you should see it ASAP because it is a shame to miss out on this type of high caliber, stupid humor.

If none of these movies sound good to you then you are without hope, but here is a listing of some that may get you in the spirit of a whole new school year.

“Revenge of the Nerds” It’s about nerds vs. frat boys. “Animal House” This movie is also about nerds vs. frat boys. “Dead Man on Campus” If your roommate off’s himself, you pass all of your classes! “Back to School” Rodney Dangerfield goes to college. “Higher Learning” This movie takes itself way too seriously for this list. “Gossip” Kate Hudson and Pacey from “The Creek” are popular and beautiful. “Road Trip” Tom Green does stupid, gross things with a mouse and a snake. “The Skulls” Pacey from “The Creek” gets into an exclusive frat! Score! “Scream 2” A bunch of innocent people get killed because Sydney goes to their college.

So find one you like and enjoy it before classes start, because unlike fictional students most of us have to spend our time studying.