Portland State Ghost and Mystery Department

The sun has left us, the rain has found us, and the return of the pumpkin spice latte has forced us to officially map out the number of Starbucks locations within a five minute walk from campus. There are six.

But wait! Before venturing out to find the best Donald Trump pumpkin lookalike, we over at the Ghost Mystery Department must caution the reader with the following warning: Evil spirits walk among us. Nothing too evil, mind you, mostly ghosts. Assuming you’ve seen Ghostbusters, you should make it through the season unharmed.

To raise your chances of survival, the GMD has constructed the following list of locations on campus. Exercising safety precautions is advised.

Underground Tunnels
Campus tunnels, which may or may not connect with the Shanghai Tunnel proper, earn our top avoidable mention. Mostly because it’s the easiest place to avoid. On the flipside, if you do visit, make sure to let us know beforehand. We would love to capture your last moments above ground, and we can even set up a before and after piece concerning your travels. Assuming you return of course.

The Library Tree
Imagine students coming together, wrapping their arms around a tree, and saving it from impending doom, i.e., bulldozer. Sound familiar? Well if it does, you have fallen victim to the oldest myth at Portland State. Namely, thinking that hippies saved every tree on campus. However, it should be noted, there have been sightings of a bohemian spirit, which seems to dance about the tree late into the night, chasing away all who venture within its domain.

Blackstone Mummies
Have you ever wondered what inspired the mummy design around Blackstone? It turns out, the discovery of King Tut’s tomb in 1922 took place around the same time Blackstone was under construction. Apparently the lead designer felt inspired. Reports abound of mummies strolling through our Saturday Market, seemingly searching for King Tut’s stolen treasure.

Vanport Flood of 1948
Although the flood that wiped out the original campus associated with PSU did not directly affect our current address, the twelve victims of the Vanport Flood still do. Be especially vigilant after a heavy rain, which is when most sightings of the “Undead Twelve” have taken place.

Stott Community Field New Moon Ghost
Not to be confused with New Moon the movie, the New Moon Ghost haunts the community field behind the library. From what we hear, the phantom is quite the soccer prodigy. You know that overachiever kicking the ball around at 3 a.m. last night? Yeah, well, not a human. The next new moon is Oct. 30, so be careful out there.

Science Research and Tech Skeletons
Imagine the movie Night at the Museum, except with no Ben Stiller or Teddy Roosevelt to save you. If you find yourself in the building when these skeletons come to life, the best advice we can give is to hide. In case of this emergency, the underground tunnels might not be such a bad option after all. Best of luck!

Well, dear reader, there you have it! Armed with your abundant knowledge of ghost related movies and your newly acquired haunted locations list, you should be able to avoid becoming a ghost yourself. No need to thank us. Although we certainly wouldn’t refuse a pumpkin spice latte.