Dear campus community,
During my tenure as Portland State president, I had the opportunity to serve the university in many ways. In that time, I made a few policy decisions that some members of the campus community disagreed with. The decision to rearm Campus Public Safety Officers (CPSO), for instance, was one initiative toward the end of my term that many students disagreed with, and you made that known.
I’m writing here today to say to you all—suck it, losers.
I’m gone! I don’t have to worry about any of this anymore. All of that’s up to your new president, Ann Cudd. CPSO rearmament? Not my problem. Extreme summer heat in university housing? It sucks to be you! Bargaining with the Portland State University Faculty Association? Wow, that seems tough. Good luck with that!
Don’t think I forgot how some of you talked about me. I remember you saying I had little idea of what’s happening on campus and not much interest in finding out. Well, guess what? Now I don’t have to know anything!
How about when you implied I had senioritis, or when you called me a coward for how I announced rearmed CPSO patrols? Is it cowardly to make a monumental policy decision with no public input in my last year of office before handing off that shift and all of its consequences to the next person in line? Yeah, I didn’t think so.
I see what you all think about Cudd. Are you having trouble getting a straight answer out of her in interviews? I bet you’re frustrated with her platitudes and non-answers about campus safety and university housing. It’s not so easy with someone new in charge. I’ll bet you’re wishing for good ol’ Stephen Percy right about now.
I’m enjoying my retirement, suckers. You think I even wanted to be President in the first place? I was an academic! This was supposed to be a transitional gig, not a permanent thing. I just wanted to be a dean, hang out in academic leadership for a while, then go home.
But no, you needed someone to step in after President Rahmat Shoureshi left, and I valiantly stepped up to take the throne. And then I got hit with a global pandemic in my first year. Are you kidding me? How is anyone supposed to deal with that?
Sure—maybe at times I seemed a little disconnected from the campus community and might not have had the best grasp on the issues. But really, who does? You would not be able to keep all the facts and figures of university business in your head. You really can’t blame me if a few things were forgotten every once in a while.
Now it’s Cudd’s turn. “One of the things we’ve heard a lot about in the last year is transparency, transparency, transparency,” I said in May. “As president, I’ve tried to be as transparent as I can be… but whatever we’re doing isn’t quite enough.” I don’t have to worry about transparency anymore, but your new president does.
For example, look at this new Portland Central City Task Force which Cudd recently announced she’s joining. A private task force that holds secret meetings about city development? Oh boy. Can you imagine if I joined something like that? It sure makes you think twice about the secrecy around CPSO rearming.
No? It doesn’t? You’re upset about both of those things?
Well fine. I’m gone, and you get your fancy new president. I never wanted the job in the first place, so I have two words for you all as I leave—good luck!