The special back-to-school edition

August became a pivotal moment for irony as the “post-war” death totals of U.S. services in Iraq toppled the death count of the actual war.

Former Portland Police Chief Mark Kroeker recently received a healthy dose of jailhouse justice that he so aptly deserved. His recent resignation only proves yet again that no one should drop the soap in the presence of Vera Katz.

Johnny Cash died and the world is a bleaker place.

Student groups all around campus quiver at the university’s proposal to tax 10 percent of operational costs in an underhanded attempt by the university to pay off gambling debts – figuratively speaking, of course. Students interested in the details of the plan can attend the Student Fee Committee’s meeting this Thursday at 1 p.m. in Smith Center; room 333.

The RIAA (Recording Industry Association of America) stuck it to a 12-year-old girl for $2,000 as a settlement in a music-sharing lawsuit. She was subpoenaed at her New York public-housing walk-up while, subsequently, Lars Ulrich, the drummer of Metallica and outspoken economic advocate of himself, received a royalty check at his mansion.

Oregon Gov. Ted Kulongoski continues to enjoy his vacation unabated by the general economic woes of his constituents.