Happy birthday to the Fonz, Grace Slick and me

You know, this day is pretty special. It is my birthday, and because it is I have decided to do a column about everything important on this day, other than me.

Many things have happened on this day throughout history. It is a day that has given birth to so many and has had the privilege of being the last day for others. People such as John Adams, the United States’ second president; Ted Williams, one of the greatest baseball players in history; Jefferson Airplane’s Grace Slick; that guy from Bush, Gavin Rossdale; and how can we forget Henry Winkler – the Fonz, “heeeeeyyy”;these people share their birthday with people like me. We should thank them, each day of our lives.

But there may be people out there saying, “Hey Sean, what about the little people. Why don’t you acknowledge them on their birthdays too?” Well, fine – I will.

I want everybody to know, that exactly 87 years ago today, the 9-time Woman Bowler of the Year, Marion Ladewig was born. Also, Miss Oregon – 1991, Brittany Gae Thompson was born on this date in 1969.

There are you happy now?

But, the happiness of birth is also followed by the unhappiness of death. Oct. 30 shares its last breath with two members of the legendary band, Lynyrd Skynyrd. They died in a plane crash on this date. Ronnie Van Zant and Steve Gaines – may they rest in peace where the music is never too loud for earplugs. Well, those two are really the only important people I know who have died on this day.

And now to the other cool things that have happened on Oct. 30.

You know Christopher Columbus? He is the guy who accidentally discovered America, then did it on purpose, then stole it, and then never really did in the first place. Well, he discovered the island of Dominica on Oct. 30 … well, at least I think he did … or did he steal it? I do not know.

A guy named Adolf became King of Sweden on this day over 300 years ago. And no, it is not Hitler. If you thought Hitler was around in the 1600s then you are not allowed to read any more of my column.

Ever heard of the War of Jenkins Ear? Me either, but it happened on this day.

Now here is something that you “right-to-bear-arms” people may enjoy, the machine gun was first patented on this day, way back in 1862. Since then machine gun deaths have increased. On a lighter note the ballpoint pen was also patented on this date. Accidents involving ballpoint pens have also dramatically increased.

Oct. 30 – “The Greatest Show on Earth” debuts. No, I am not talking about a Pavement reunion concert for all you indie junkies, I am talking about P. T. Barnum’s circus. It was full of elephants and rope tricks. Yup, that is basically it. Is the modern day version that Scary Animals TV show on FOX? It had an elephant that freaked out once and ran amuck down the streets. The animal was later killed.

This is my personal favorite: Jack the Ripper killed his last victim today. Well, not “today”, but over 120 years ago. They still don’t know who he was – creepy.

The spitball was abolished from Major League Baseball 82 years ago today. Since then, attacking players with wooden bats has become completely acceptable.

Watch out everybody. Aliens are a-comin’! Just kidding. That is what Orson Welles said on this date back when he panicked the nation with his “War of the Worlds” broadcast.

Well, there you have it. A look into the history of Oct. 30. And I would just like to say one more thing: Happy Birthday to me – and the Fonz.